Well, it's been a while. XD

Soooo it's kind of been a while... life has been kind of crazy.
Like, life is worth living entirely, but it's exhausting. Especially when so much effort is put into finally ending some things. I kind of feel like my life has been a rollercoaster; literally. Little jam-packed sessions of action and then times where I have way too much time on my hands. Like a rollercoaster it's been flipping from crazy to pretty well not moving so it seems.

The last... well two months... I spent a lot of them crying. More than I'd like to admit. Summed up short, a breakup. Yeah I broke up with the guy (don't judge please) but that I feel is almost worse bc you have to hurt a person you never wanted to. And I am happy to say that I think I've finally reached a state where I can put that all behind me and move on. Although, okay, honestly started moving on a little while ago because majorly confused over might be feelings for a guy...

On top of that, well, there's school. Always school. I've felt a LOT of pressure in school. See, my family is NOT the best off financially. At all. So for me to go to University for what I want, I kind of need a scholarship.... and (honestly not trying ot brag) I'm quite used to low or mid 90s with little to no effort. But, we got a new teacher (former one is on mat. leave) for chem and math (basically the two most important subjects for forensic science). She's a lovely lady but I have trouble learning from how she teaches and so my marks in those subjects' marks have dropped and it was really stressing me out for a bit(yeah I know they don't look at grade eleven marks but if you don't understand grade 11 subjects how are you supposed to understand grade 12 ones? XD ). :$ I eventually broke down about it to my mom and she said it was fine; she assured me she knows I am trying my best and we can work it out if it jeopardizes my average.
But, well, okay... today, for no apparent reason as to why today, I kind of finally felt some peace about it all. Like, I had a really nice conversation with a friend on Fri night about this sort of stuff. And he kept telling me not to worry about it; it's in God's hands. Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." and Matthew 6: 25-34 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? ²⁶ Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? ²⁷ Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?²⁸ “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. ²⁹ Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. ³⁰ If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? ³¹ So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ ³² For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. ³³ But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. ³⁴ Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."
MAJOR help right there. Bc I know these verses, but sometimes just need to hear them again to clue in to them XD
So, well, yeah... God's just been amazing. He hasn't left my side through any of this. I am so undeserving, but He sees me trying and comes to help me... so thankful for Him, <3

Well, that's all for today! God bless! -Emma

P.S. Random, but, well, recentlyI've started praying for the guy I am gonna' marry. Laugh if you will but I think it's a good idea to pray for the person you're gonna' marry. God has a plan but the Devil is always trying to screw it up. So pray for that person, whoever they are, the God will protect them for you and bring them to you/(or you to them) in His perfect timing. Also, praying for them certainly makes them feel more real... makes you really believe that they are actually out there and you're not literally "forever alone".

October! :D

HAPPY OCTOBER! :D

Yeah, so I kind of love October, in case that wasn't clear. The artsy side gets the best of me and so I adore the fall colors. Also, I love the temperature. It's not too hot or cold; just comfortable. However, probs my top reason; IT HAS MY BIRTHDAY! :D Yeuuupp! 30 days til Halloweeeeeeen! :D And, this year, it's my Sweet Sixteen! :D

But, well, the fact it's October is only part of the reason I am in such a gosh-darned good mood. Some other small contributors are things like I have no homework, my Doctor Who epsideos SHOULD be on the way soon, I am going out to dinner with my fam tonight, and I feel pretty confident about my two upcoming tests at school.

Biggest reason for my being happy, though: G. O. D. Yeup :) God <3 Just saying, He has made my life SO amazing. And, well, recently I have been REALLY trying to go further in my faith, and God is definetly meeting me on that! :D I have seen some super cool stuff going on, recently. Probably the biggest one of these, is that fact that there's a guy who I have known since, like, kindergarten, He's pretty darned awesome. Like, smart, funny, has awesome music and movie tastes, and well I could go on for a while about him. I know that sounds SUPER weird, but, yeah, he's like a brother to me. (haha say fam-zoned if you want but he has a girlfriend he's been with for about 2 and 1/2 years who he's super happy with so don't go getting any wrong ideas about him and I haha :P ). But, to the point; he's an atheist. And, well, since I left that school where we went together, I have been hoping and praying he'll convert (no pressure since I know you're reading this lol :). A few Sundays ago at church, we spent some time individually just praying for unsaved people we know. I WAS BAWLING MY EYES OUT IN MINUTES. There are SO many people I want so badly to be saved. I mean, badly enough that, well, if I could give my life for them to believe, I would. Now, this guy got into 3SN (AMAZING CHANNEL ON LIFE FROM SAT AT 9PM til SUNDAY AT 2AM :D BE WARNED IT IS ALL HARDCORE/AMAZING MUSIC :P ) the night before that service. It's a Christian station, so, well, even that thrilled me. Then, this weekend I invited him to try out my youth group; I'll be honest I was expecting a "Uh, no... sorry... too weird..." and instead, I got a maybe :D Sure it's not a yes, but well, it's better than no. I honestly wanted to go dance around my room (I didn't for the record lol :P ). So, well, now I'm praying God will let it fall into place that he can come (again, since I know you're reading this, no pressure ;)  ).

That's just one of a few ways I've seen God working in the lives of people around me. All of it has me T.H.R.I.L.L.E.D! :D

Also, as a note, in the first time for a LONG time, today is the first day I've been feeling truly at peace about some stuff that's been going on in my life (mainllyyyyy guys....).

Well, I have to go (school is over soon and I have to get offffff and pack upppp)! And I was gonna' do this later but I am out tonight to celebrate my cousin's birthday! :D

So, I'm praying for you all! Maybe God will use these blogs for His glory in your life. :)

God bless!